"You Can't Measure Up"

Funny thing . . . on the surface, society and God both tell us the same thing:

"You can't possibly measure up."

Society-- through media like television, music, movies, print, and digital-- tells us we can't measure up to its standards.  Through these different outlets, society has set the standard for perfection: the perfect life, perfect family, perfect job, perfect body, etc. Society keeps sending us the message that we aren't good enough. "You're not rich enough, beautiful enough, smart enough, popular enough, etc." Society looks on us with disdain, disapproval, even disgust, and we can get caught up in a restless, ceaseless struggle for unattainable perfection. 

In a way, God says we can't measure up, too-- that is, we can't merit salvation on our own (CCC 2007). We need His grace just to come to faith in Him, and even that faith is a gift we are given freely by a God who looks at us as we are, takes us as we are, and loves us as we are. After all, He created us! This is an incredibly different outcome of what seems to be a similar message on the surface. 

When it comes to my own children and my students, I'm going to do my best to help them learn not to worry about failing to measure up to society's impossible standards. I want my children and students to know that:

• God accepts them, loves them, and died for them, making their salvation possible.  
• Even though they couldn't earn this gift on their own, it's attainable.
• With God there's no need to struggle. No seeking perfection through 10 easy steps found in the latest People Magazine or Facebook post. 

I want my students to know that with God, they don't need to worry about not measuring up because He doesn't look at what they're lacking.  He only sees children He loves so much that He sent His Son to die so that He would not to have to spend eternity without them.

Come to think of it, I could stand to hear that more often myself. How about you?

Photo credit: Sepehr Ehsani via photopin cc

Thanks Be to God

Examples of Thankfulness
Probably each of us knows someone who just oozes gratitude and thankfulness. I'm talking about that person in your life who never seems to focus on what he or she doesn't have, but is always grateful for the gifts and blessings of his or her life. Even in dark or difficult moments, this person has an attitude of gratitude that often surprises us and leaves us in awe. 

Although I've met many people like this in the last few years, one stands out. She came from what many people would consider humble beginnings, and she lived with energy and enthusiasm, loving life no matter what the circumstances. She'd often punctuate her sentences with a "Praise God" or "Thank you, Jesus." For her, each moment-- whether positive or negative-- was a gift from God, drawing us closer to Him. Even during a struggle with illness, she remained positive. Clearly, gratefulness was not something she put on occasionally like a jacket or hat, but it was part of the very fabric of her being.

Gratitude Genes
As I get older, I long for that same kind of gratitude to run deep into the core of my being, to be ingrained into my DNA so that I might be grateful without thinking about it. I'd love to be focused not on what is missing, what I don't have, what could be better, or what needs to change, but on the gifts God has given me, no matter how small.

I don't have all of the answers, but I think the key is what (or whom) you're looking at. As long as my eyes are focused on the gifts, it's easy to become negative and disheartened during those times when the gifts don't seem to be flowing my way. However, if my eyes are focused on the Giver of those gifts, and my heart is focused on the way He loves me, then everything becomes a gift, whether positive or negative on the surface.

Thankful Children
As for our kids, it becomes pretty obvious that giving them the "gratitude gene" isn't something that can happen during the last few days before Thanksgiving (although it's never too late to start!). Gratitude can become part of the family DNA over time through a daily focus on "thanks giving" that becomes part of the family history, and by keeping the family's focus on the "Giver" and not the "gifts."

• What are those big family milestones with which God has blessed us?
• In what ways has God brought healing to our family? Happiness? Sustenance? Joy?
• How was God present during our difficulties? Where was He in the midst of the storm?
• And most importantly, How has God promised to care for us and be faithful to His promises? How has He demonstrated His love for us?  

Bringing these reflections into family prayer time regularly just might help our children develop the gratitude gene.

Happy Thanksgiving to all, and God Bless You.

Photo credit: rustiqueart via photopin cc

The Space Alien Sitting Next to Me

As I sit at my kitchen table composing this blog, something resembling a miniature human being (left) with a familiar face is sitting in a high chair next to me yelling, giggling, and gurgling "AhhhDadadadada!" 

Of course, the only logical explanation is that extra-terrestrials exist and they've invaded my home. 

Yes, I typed "logical." 

After all, she can't be my daughter (left). My daughter was just born in February. My beautiful baby girl was only a little longer than my forearm. I could carry her like a football! She could occasionally muster up a blood-curdling scream, but she spent most of her time sleeping, blinking, soiling diapers, and such.

At some point, this E.T. must have transported into the kids' bedroom in the middle of the night, replacing my little infant. (They took her brother years ago.) This creature that now lives in our home and masquerades as our daughter is over three times the weight and twice the length of my missing infant! It holds its own bottle, eats at the table with the rest of the family, pulls itself up on its knees to look over the side of its crib, and has two teeth jutting from its lower jaw.

It Happens So Fast
As a parent I don't have to tell you twice. Tempting as it is to go with the space alien/E.T. excuse (how else to justify their behavior sometimes?), they really do grow up that fast. 

So no matter how much we think about it, pray about, read blogs and books about it-- the fact that it happens so fast means that an essential ingredient in growing faith-filled kids is letting go and entrusting them to our Lord (who is beyond time . . . In other words, He can keep up with them).

Now go hug your space alien, tell 'em you love 'em, and while you're at it, tell them that God loves them, too.  

Have a great week. God Bless!